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winterwolf797

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REBOOT

4 min read

Let's see if I can keep this relatively short and to the point...


Two years ago I decided my life needed a reboot - for my sake and the sake of my kids. Pulling it off meant putting aside my writing (yet again) and my art, and pretty much everything else I enjoy doing (reading, gaming, etc). When the right opportunity came along we packed up what would fit in the car, moved far away, and started over. No more family-members-as-roommates because it's a necessity just to get by. Nope; the cost of living is reasonable, maybe a third what it was where we were before - half at most. And now it's just us again. I can pay the bills myself. Our home is ours.


There are some disadvantages, though. I work double the hours I used to and my commute is easily three times what it used to be, so I still have little time for the things I enjoy most. I have two days off and try to cram as much into them as I can: mostly video games, watching a few shows, and resting up so I can go back to work without feeling worn out. I rarely get to check in with DeviantArt, no more than a quick perusal once in awhile at work when things are slow, and then only on my phone. Using cell phones for anything other than phone calls and the occasional brief text message gives me awful headaches. I also found out the hard way that it can actually trigger a seizure (I'm epileptic) if I spend too much time on one! And work requires me to make frequent updates on their phones already, so... yeah, f**k cell phones and all this mobile crap. So now you know why I haven't been active on DeviantArt since Jan 2021.

An unfortunate consequence of this reboot is that I obliterated decades of erotic-themed writing, most of which could easily stand without the erotica if edited. One lapse in judgment and poof! Hundreds of pages of material containing entire Fantasy worlds, SciFi adventures, the history of the Somerset Family, and more all gone. I've never done that before, not with my writing. After it sank in what had happened, what I'd done, I decided to let it go; it was probably for the best. So many of the story ideas and concepts were great and I put so much effort into them over the years, but it would've taken a lot of editing and rewrites to make them something I'd be satisfied with now. And It was just the one folder. I still have all my important stories waiting for me to find time to come back to them.


However! I did start outlining (in bits and pieces) a rewrite of one lost character: the life story and adventures of Doll, written this time in her words rather than her best friend's. She's quite possibly the oldest character concept I'd ever come up, inspired by an Easyriders magazine I should not have been looking through at so young an age. I tried searching my gallery here to piece a few things back together, but honestly, my DA page looks to me like a total f**king mess now. Dakota Ravensong will return because she and Doll are inseparable, but I've focused this time around on the years before they met. That's in written form, not digitally rendered. I've managed to make a few character portraits with DAZ Studio from time to time, and redesigned Doll's shape (she's got the same essential formula, though). Whether or not any new art or fragments of related story find their way onto DeviantArt is uncertain.


All the best to everyone here I follow, who follow me, and (since I haven't said it yet) my apologies for going so long without any kind of response through this community. I'm not back, but I'm not dead. And I'm doing better in most of the ways that matter.

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Nine and Gone

2 min read
Tuesday morning (January 14th, 2020) my old Dell XPS 420 finally died. I've had it since early 2011, given to me by my father. He was clearing out some spare towers he had laying around. There were no hard drives in it, so I put in two, an NVidia card, and as much RAM as it could take (which was only 6 gigs). It lasted longer and did more for me than any other computer I've owned since 1996. That's when I got my first basic pc, intended primarily for writing.

What this loss means is that Vintage Doll VI is my final DAZ Studio render for the foreseeable future. My financial situation is such that it will likely be impossible to replace my old computer any time soon. I do have my laptop, of course, but it can't handle DAZ. It barely runs World of Warcraft: Classic! It's almost strictly a writing-and-research machine now - especially since its all I have left. I don't want to risk it on anything else. I knew this day was coming, that I needed to get a completely new computer, but hoped the XPS 420 could survive another year.
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Because of moving, work, and all the considerations that go with them my DA notifications had gone way, way up, like... over 9,000! Two thirds of them were from photographers, the rest from traditional and digital artists. And this was after I'd already taken a day to drop it from 6,000 to 3,000 then it went back up to 9K+!

I generally insist on looking through everything from the people I follow. I may not have time to comment (I rarely have time to comment) but I do look. So I went through all digital and traditional art first, then dug into the photography. I've got it down to a little over 2,000 now - all photos. So...

I apologize to the wonderful photographers out there if I hit you back with a bunch of +fav notifications, but the volume of work you (and your models) can put out is both staggering and well worth taking time to look at every beautiful image. You have my thanks for sharing so much with everyone on DeviantArt.
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Recent drama and controversy here on DeviantArt regarding what is and is not Mature and/or Explicit Content has been... troubling to say the least. DeviantArt's rules make it difficult to investigate the situation, gaining a better understanding of it from all sides, and the interactions between numerous artists and writers falling into one camp or another do not help. I've been seeing overreaction from- Well, I won't say "both sides" because there are more than two viewpoints, but many reactions back and forth, especially in comment sections, have struck me as childish and willfully ignorant, incapable of seeing things from any perspective but their own. This disturbs me as much as any attack on artistic expression.

There is a lot of art on here I do not care for and there are things that offend me, but I won't spend my limited time hunting those things down, passing judgement, and making trouble for the artists who create them. Likewise I'd hope they do the same because what appeals to me is my business as what appeals to them is theirs. It's only when these things cause real, physical harm to another human being that any of us have the right - an obligation even - to say something and/or take action. I would include "criminal" in that definition of harm, but DeviantArt is worldwide and there are conflicting laws just between states in the U.S. nevermind international differences.

The righteous indignation you've seen from me regarding one of my portraits being targeted has been directed only at those who deserve it - as best as it can be directed since they are protected by anonymity. No one else has really weighed in with an opinion opposing my views, but if they had I'd have responded courteously. I'd even welcome it. What I would not do is use whatever block or ignore feature is in place here just because someone disagrees with me. I would rather do my best to change a person's mind using facts and whatever passion I have for those facts. And if I can't, if you can't, then we should at least agree to disagree without later attacking each each other indirectly through deceitful means. I've never used an ignore feature for any reason, not even in an MMO like World of Warcraft, which I've played since release day November 23rd, 2004. That's a long time full of many encounters with unpleasant and disagreeable players. And beyond that: slandering people who disagree with you, spreading lies and false information about them, does no service to you or any cause you represent. If anything it makes you no better than you imagine them to be.

I'll tell you: this drama, dealing with its effects on me personally, and trying to investigate how it's affecting other people and what brought it on - trying to get to the facts of the situation - I honestly feel like I'm dealing with a classroom of children. This is where I would tell my own kids, "If you can't get along you both lose. You go to that corner and you go to that one, and both of you think long and hard about how you got there and if it was really worth it." I also take away whatever toys caused the fight. I want no part of drama that includes childish insults, misplaced anger, and paranoia. If any further controversy comes my way I'll deal with it, but after this journal entry, after the render I've been working on in support of a suspended author is finished, so am I. Hopefully...

There is one more detail related to this topic that concerns me: it's been said that the same definitions of Mature and Explicit Content that apply to visual art are applied to writing - to the short and episodic stories people upload here. If that's true I completely disagree with it. They are not the same thing. With a painting, drawing, or whatever someone can glance at it briefly and that's all it takes to determine if there is nudity, violence and gore, or ideologically sensitive material on display. With writing, however, in reading someone's fiction, you have to take time to decipher the words, their context, and their meaning. You have to actually get involved and if you think you might not like what's happening you have to make a conscious decision to continue. That is on you, the reader, not the author - especially if it was already flagged as Mature Content. I mean, wow! By these standards I could never post one of Ysabel's stories here. I couldn't post Deshret's either. Maybe some of Layla's...
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"Does your deviation, More Riches, contain mature content?"

No. No, it does not as defined by the submission policy. I even made it a point to say as much when I posted the image. There is no nudity, there are no sexual themes, no violence or gore, no strong language, and if anything about this computer generated woman is ideologically sensitive, well then I can't bring myself to care about your ideology. Go review some Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition covers, a magazine sold and prominently displayed on many newsstands, then think long and hard on whether or not your argument against my lesser quality work has merit. If you are ideologically offended by a woman (let alone a fictional one depicted in art) there's something very wrong with you, something detrimental to the continuation of the human species.

Taken directly from the DeviantArt FAQ topic: What is Mature Content? as it appeared on January 18th, 2018 - "Nudity: This flag is appropriate if your work contains explicit nudity; revealing the genitalia of a model or fictional character or revealing a full female breast including nipples."

The character depicted here - my original, fictional character? Her nipples are covered. End of discussion.

Wait. It's not the end? What's that you say? There's a bit of areola showing above the linen wrap? And your point is... what? Nipples and areola are not the same thing. They are connected, true - one surrounds the other - but they are separately defined. I've read lately some people making the argument that a woman's breasts (and thus all parts of it) are sexual. No, they are "sexualized" as a result of certain cultural beliefs. In other words: it's a fantasy. It's made up. It's all in your head.

Do female breasts exhibit certain temporary changes during arousal? Sure. So do many other parts of the body belonging to both genders. If you'd like to make the argument that female breasts are "erogenous zones" and that's what makes them "sexual," well, you could be right from a certain point of view, but still wrong in this instance. Erogenous zones vary from person to person. The breasts, nipples, lips, tongue, neck, and inner thighs are commonly shared spots by women and men. How we react to stimulation of these areas can be different from person to person and depending on the relationship and situation. Again, a lot of it is in our minds. If you try to restrict depictions of the major erogenous zone possibilities then you have to insist that every character on DeviantArt - male and female - dress like a ninja. Or, at least like whichever Doctor Who wore that ridiculous scarf.

The bottom line is: if I wanted to use a Mature Content tag I'd have just rendered More Riches and More Riches II (which, oddly enough, I didn't get a notice for) without the linen wrap, without the slightest concession to modesty, and I'd have never received this silly "correspondence." But I did make that concession. I did it in accordance with DeviantArt's submission guidelines and policies. Funny how that worked out.

And as a side note: "correspondence" is the wrong word for something that appears to be generated automatically and provides no means of actual correspondence. I'm guessing that it's just an auto-report feature where anyone can click that little Report flag under the picture and a passive-aggressive message is sent. I despise features like that; they enable and encourage that anonymous, cowardly behavior generally associated with online interactions. If you're going to use it at least have the courage to make a comment explaining why under the artwork you intend to report. You don't have to be mean. Just say your piece, make your point, and that's that. Treat people the way you want to be treated even if you don't like what you see. It's just images and words on a screen. It can't physically harm you. One of the real advantages of an internet community is that you can think about what what you want to say before you say it. You don't often get that option in everyday life. I'm actually much nicer online because I stop and think about something before I send it. You have no idea how much I deleted from this journal entry. In reality I can be a pretty mean son-of-a-bitch if the situation calls for it.

Censorship and hypocrisy are among those things that bring it out in me.

UPDATE: So... I just woke up to find that a Mature Content tag was forced onto the image anyway. It takes a lot to offend me. This does the trick. Congratulations. I'm disputing it.
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Featured

REBOOT by winterwolf797, journal

Nine and Gone by winterwolf797, journal

Notifications Level... It's Over 9000! by winterwolf797, journal

Drama and Controversy by winterwolf797, journal

Does Your Deviation Contain Mature Content? by winterwolf797, journal